But he said: “You will not feel surprised if there are some fairly well-known tunes with different words. And you will not be surprised if the audience is invited to sing along.”Edna – the Spectacle Returns has its premiere at the Yvonne Arnaud Theatre in Guildford, Surrey, a week tomorrow. Dame Edna wins a “lovely mother” prize in Melbourne and it is sponsored by “The Daily Murdoch”.The second half will be Dame Edna with old sidekick Madge, who has threatened to rival Lord Archer in the running for London’s mayor.Lord Archer said he and fellow art lover Mr Humphries went back 20 years and he had asked the peer if he could launch the show in his sumptuous riverside apartment.He had not seen all the show, including songs by Kit Hesketh-Harvey and James McConnel. But it claimed later that the central thrust of the documentary, transmitted in January 1996 and entitled “St Michael: Has the halo slipped?”, had not been discredited by the ruling.Charles Tremayne, controller of factual programmes, said the programme had proven that some 13 and 14-year-olds were employed in the factory and that a consignment of pyjamas made there had been mislabelled “Made in the UK” by its Northern Ireland-based supplier, Desmonds.”We never intended to give the impression that M&S knew of these practices and we don’t accept that the programme gave such an impression,” he said.Sir Richard Greenbury, chairman of M&S, said: “We will always take firm action to protect our reputation.”.

DAME EDNA EVERAGE is being bankrolled by Jeffrey Archer. The unlikely combination – they have apparently been friends for 20 years – presented themselves at Lord Archer’s penthouse flat in London yesterday, complete with its Lowrys and Monets, to announce that Lord Archer will be putting up the pounds 500,000 for Dame Edna’s next West End show.
In a press conference by the Dame which turned into a monologue almost as long and just as funny as one of her shows, she broke with the usual convention of actorly solidarity.She would show herself on stage, she said, to be “a kind of upmarket Judi Dench, an attractive Glenda Jackson, a well-dressed Diana Rigg”.The all-new show will for the first time tell the story of Dame Edna’s childhood, youth and marriage to ill-fated Norm, as well as his subsequent unfortunate medical history.”My husband’s first urological accident has been set to music and dance – that’s unique in the history of theatre,” Dame Edna said.”Funnily enough, since he passed away, his prostate has never been in better health.”Dame Edna’s alter ego Barry Humphries will pop up in the show to play Rupert Murdoch. But Brian Barrett, Virgin Trains’ chief executive, said a possible further upgrade could see trains travelling at 160mph – which would reduce the 1 hour 40 minutes from London to Birmingham to less than 60 minutes.. Virgin already have a deal with Railtrack, owner of the nation’s track and signalling, to spend pounds 2bn on the dilapidated West Coast. More than 1,000 British jobs at GEC Alsthom’s Washwood Heath facility in Birmingham will be secured by the announcement.Another pounds 850m will be spent on 77 trains – 43 of which can tilt – for the company’s CrossCountry franchise.Virgin said the twists and turns of the network meant that tilting trains – manufactured by Canadian firm Bombardier – were the only way to bring down travelling times.Richard Branson, chairman of Virgin Group, said the train deals would herald nothing less than a “revolution in long-distance travel by rail in Britain.”Mr Branson is keen to dispel doubts about his train service, which suffered last year from poor punctuality.”We are now seeing 90 per cent of services running on time,” said Mr Branson, adding that passenger numbers were “up 13 per cent in 11 months”.With a billion-pound stockmarket floatation planned this summer, Virgin need to placate some City analysts who remain sceptical of the company’s ability to persuade passengers to use its trains. On the CrossCountry service the trip from Birmingham to Bristol will come down from the current 1 hour 27 minutes to 1 hour eight minutes by 2003.The most ambitious proposals, for the company’s West Coast route, would see 55 new trains capable of 160mph traversing the line from London to Scotland.

A pounds 1.85bn order for a new generation of tilting trains on Britain’s railways could shrink the journey time between London and Birmingham to little more than an hour, according to plans unveiled by Virgin Trains yesterday. Staff at Kings Mill Hospital, Sutton in Ashfield, Nottinghamshire, have been banned from using pet names to address patients.And switchboard staff at Leeds Council must not address callers as “love”, even though Bella’s survey shows that Yorkshire people were the least likely to be upset by the use of this term.. The company’s plans for more than 130 new trains coupled with a pounds 2bn upgrade on the West Coast service between London and Scotland will cut more than a third off some journey times for its 23 million passengers.
The first trains go into service in 2000 and two years later Virgin aims to have its full fleet up and running.By 2005 the time taken from London to Glasgow will be cut from 5 hours 20 minutes to 3 hours 50 minutes. EXPRESSIONS such as “love”, “duck” or “chuck” are politically incorrect and should be outlawed, according to a survey released yesterday. Almost half the 1,000 people questioned said they objected to being called “dear” by people they met on a formal basis – such as dentists, receptionists and tradesmen.
But 72 per cent of those questioned did not feel the same way about their use by nurses and said they were happy for staff in caring professions to use pet names.According to the poll, carried out by NOP Solutions for Bella magazine, bosses and police officers were strongly criticised for using terms of endearment.The strongest objectors to pet names were women, especially 15- to 24-year-olds.A total of 63 per cent in that age group said they were offended by tradesmen calling them “love”.This compares with 36 per cent of women over the age of 65 who are generally more tolerant, the survey found.Several organisations have already banned their staff from using pet names.

The ITV station was also ordered to contribute pounds 650,000 towards the retail giant’s legal costs over a World in Action documentary which alleged that M&S knew of child exploitation in a Moroccan factory used by a supplier and misled customers by selling foreign-made garments labelled “Made in the UK”.
Granada accepted the verdict and made an unreserved apology. English and reading were among the subjects for which television is most used and seen as most beneficial.. ST MICHAEL’S halo was restored yesterday when Marks & Spencer won an apology and pounds 50,000 libel damages from Granada Television in the High Court. Frank Willis, ITC director of advertising and sponsorship, said advertisers had been warned about using the technique.A third ITC study released yesterday, on television as a teaching aid, found that those students who enjoyed learning from television were more likely to value reading as a learning method. The computer technique, which transforms people into creatures, has been used in adverts by Peugeot and Irn Bru. However, even though some of the children found them disturbing they realised they were simply cartoons, that nobody got hurt and that the good characters always won. And for younger viewers the more frightening, complex plots were more likely to go over their heads, boring them rather than upsetting them.Peter Rogers, ITC chief executive, said: “This research shows that children can be as discerning in their viewing as adults.”Another ITC report suggested young children could be disturbed by “morphing” images in advertising.

The first category was enjoyed by those who participated in the report, often because there was excitement and humour, but few enjoyed the latter, which often included the use of violent weapons.Ms Chambers said some of the mothers were shocked by the aggressive and “dark” programmes their children were watching. “Cartoons are an important part of children’s viewing because they are short and easy to dip in and out of,” she said. “They’re more relaxing, than challenging, to watch.”The survey, covering more than 60 children, their mothers and two whole families, found no difference between the attitudes of youngsters who watched cable and satellite and those who saw only terrestrial television.The report drew a distinction between cartoons like The Flintstones, Scooby Doo and Rugrats and action animations such as Street Sharks, Spiderman and Batman And Robin.While they had a broad appeal, only the narrow band of boys aged five to seven enjoyed action cartoons and many watched them only because nothing else was on.The report found the most popular cartoons were those like Tom and Jerry which included slapstick humour.The ITC also found a difference between “good scary” cartoons, like Scooby Doo, and “bad scary” ones such as the computer-animated Reboot. CONCERN that children are addicted to high action, violent cartoons is groundless, according to research published yesterday.